Seeds of death

800 rupees is what I spent
to buy 450gms of seeds so I can plant
seeds alone won’t grow
so bought chemicals and fertilizers and I spent all the remaining dough

Water was scarce and rain was sparse
Opted for a loan at a high interest rate
So I could dig up a well, install a pump to control my own fate
Started with 100ft, increased to 250ft, desperation pushed to 500ft
Still no trace of water, just digging in vain in the scratching heat

Dry wells, dry lands, no grains, just seeds
Banks refused, money lenders rescued but took away our land deeds

Forget about kids education
I couldn’t keep my family from starvation
Not one, not two, weeks went by but not a drop for irrigation

I was tired, I was frustrated
I was ashamed and I was defeated
No help was available, my situation was non bailable

I sowed the seeds in anticipation of a new life
Instead they dragged me away from my kids and my wife
I thought once, I thought twice
But didn’t have a choice
Other than to use the pesticide
and commit suicide
In my dying moments I realized
What I sowed were seeds of death and not that of life


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